How to Heal a Wound That Won’t Heal
“Hidden wounds are the recollections from your past that when you think about them, they still cause pain in your life.”
“A wound that has been present for more than six weeks is considered a chronic wound and may need special treatment,” according to Dr. Prasad Kilaru, a plastic surgeon and director of the Washington Center for Wound Healing and Hyperbaric Medicine.
Have you ever had a cut that required stitches? Have you ever had a surgery of any kind? Deep cuts and surgical procedures leave wounds that often require stitches. Eventually the stitches are removed and the pain goes away. What do you do about wounds you can’t see? How do you begin to stitch emotional wounds embedded deep within the recesses of one’s heart?
Hidden Wounds Are Memories That HurtHidden wounds are the recollections from your past that when you think about them, they still cause pain in your life. Some define them as memories of abandonment. Some have memories of abuse. Some even have memories of ridicule, criticism or hatred.
Hidden wounds come from prejudices in society. They come from family members (they are the ones that hurt the most). Sometimes they come from parents, our children, our siblings, and aunts and uncles. You can get wounded in the work place. They’re everywhere.
I’ve been a pastor for a long time, and I’ve talked to people and I’ve learned two truths about life.
- Everyone has a hidden wound. You may be masking it, but everybody has a hidden wound—an emotional scar from someone in the past who hurt you in a serious way.
- Hidden wounds (emotional scars) take longer to heal than physical wounds.
“I am Jehovah Rapha,” which means, “I am the God who heals.”The Bible says this in Psalm 147:
God heals the brokenhearted and bandages their wounds.
How does He do that?
Healing Begins When Secrecy EndsThe last person you should be dishonest with is yourself. You’re never going to get well until you face your feelings straight on. Psalm 39 talks about the problem of suppressing your feelings. It says:
I kept very quiet, but I became even more upset. I became very angry inside, and as I thought about it, my anger burned. Psalm 39: 2-3The author’s saying how holding on to hurts is like carrying hot coals in your heart—you’re the one who gets burned. Hidden wounds, when you try to suppress them, don’t heal. They fester. Pushing a hurt aside doesn’t get rid of it. It just makes it worse.
Are You Ready to Be Healed?If you said yes, then be honest about your pain, your fear, your anger, and your resentment and bitterness over what people did to you. You start by revealing your hurts to three different people:
- Be honest with yourself. You have to own up to “This hurts! I’m ashamed of this, or I still hurt over this.”
- Be honest with God. You say, “God, this is how I feel!” and you vent, let it all out. God can handle that. He already knows how you hurt because He saw it when you were hurt. God’s not surprised when you’re honest about the pain and shame in your life. He already knows, cares and loves you.
- Be honest with your accountability partner. There’s something healing about revealing your feeling to someone you trust. When you suppress it, you’re only hurting yourself. You’re never going to get well until you reveal your hurts.
The Reverend Clarence E. Stowers, Jr. was born on December 2, 1966 to Dr. Clarence (deceased) and Margaret Stowers, Sr. in Evanston, Illinois. He began his spiritual pilgrimage at Mars Hill under the leadership of Dr. Clarence E. Stowers, Sr. He accepted his call to preach the gospel in 1991 and was licensed and ordained at Mars Hill. More from C. E. Stowers or visit C. E. at http://www.cestowers.com/